quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Randomize
