The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
