I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
