nut hugger
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I cut my penus on the lid.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
