yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize