so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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