That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
