ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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