you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
