Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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