I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
