One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
