An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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