i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
