fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
