So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
