Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize