Just fell off a train. Bad.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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