im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I want her autograph on my taint
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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