i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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