found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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