I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
