I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
