How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
