let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Randomize
