omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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