Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
