Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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