look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
