I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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