remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
