question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
