He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
