I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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