We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
