We're facebook friends in real life
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
