Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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