I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
