If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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