hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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