Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
God, you're like boner-b-gone
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
