Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Randomize
