So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
