Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
