Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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