I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
