wat bout pragnant strippers??
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
