dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
