Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
