3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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